Am I really made for dog parenthood? I am starting to doubt if being a dog mom is really my thing

I’m starting to doubt if I’m really suited for being a dog owner. I’ve always loved dogs and thought I’d have one forever, but my current dog, a fearful and reactive rescue, has really worn me out. She’s anxious, doesn’t like walks or toys, barks constantly, and has been tough to handle, even with medication and a behaviorist. It’s been draining on my mental health. Rehoming isn’t an option, so I’m committed to her, but I’m unsure if I’ll ever get another dog after her. Maybe I’m just not cut out for dog ownership, or maybe a calmer dog would be different, I don’t know.

It sounds like you’re not struggling with owning a dog in general, but with the challenges of caring for a reactive, anxious one, especially as your first dog. The shelter may not have known about her issues since dogs can behave differently in homes than in shelters. In the future, adopting from a rescue with foster care might help avoid surprises like this. You clearly have the dedication to be a dog owner, as you’ve worked hard to help her. The decision to get another dog later is up to you, depending on whether you feel ready for it. Best of luck with your pup!

When I adopted her, the shelter only told me she was fearful and needed leash training. I assumed she just needed more socialization and leash practice. But what I got was a dog terrified of going outside, who barks and nips at strangers and refuses to walk on a leash. I had no idea dogs could be too afraid to go on walks. The shelter couldn’t offer much help and even suggested rehoming her. I unknowingly made her fear worse by pushing her outside, following bad advice. It took time to learn about proper training for dogs with extreme anxiety.

It’s understandable that you were caught off guard. Just like with breeders, some shelters and rescues are responsible, while others aren’t as careful. I volunteer at a rescue, and we avoid working with certain shelters because they don’t share important info or vet their dogs properly.

When I adopted my dog, I was cautious and lucky to avoid issues, especially since we already had an older dog that helped us pick a compatible companion. I’ve seen both successes and failures with rescues and breeder-purchased puppies. There’s always some risk, but thorough research can help.

If you decide to adopt again in the future, a rescue could help match you with a calm, well-suited dog. You’ve shown you’re committed, and rescues appreciate that. Alternatively, adopting a retired adult dog from a reputable breeder might be less overwhelming than starting with a puppy after your tough experience.

Sadly, many shelters downplay a dog’s behavioral problems to get them adopted. That’s why I prefer getting dogs from people who can’t care for them anymore, have to move to places that don’t allow pets, or need to rehome unexpected litters.

Maybe look for a dog that has been fostered, as they usually come with detailed information about their behavior. Shelters often lack the resources to fully understand each dog due to being understaffed and underfunded.